Lemurians Emerge from Mt. Shasta, Immediately Go Back Inside After Seeing Gas Prices

*Happy April Fool’s Day! This article is part of the Active NorCal April Fool’s Day Extravaganza. Don’t @ us.

The legendary beings that live in Mount Shasta have finally emerged from the mountain to present their existence to mankind, but it didn’t go exactly as they had planned.

Lemurians are an ancient, super-advanced society that has lived under Mount Shasta for millions of years ago, sporadically coming above ground and blending in with the locals. They had planned their public unveiling for 2020, but were immediately scolded for not “sheltering-in-place.” Now, they have attempted to emerge from the mountain once again, but realized how expensive it would be to get around.

“We had planned an entire world tour to unite the Lemurians and humans. But after looking at gas prices, we realized we can’t afford it,” said one of the humanoid leaders.

With the last two attempts to emerge from the mountain thwarted, will we ever get to meet our neighbors in the beloved Mount Shasta? With the way the world’s going, probably not.