Mount Shasta Declares Independence from California, Applies for Statehood

*Happy April Fool’s Day! This article is part of the Active NorCal April Fool’s Day Extravaganza. Don’t @ us.

In a bold move that stunned state officials and delighted conspiracy theorists, Mount Shasta has formally declared independence from California and submitted paperwork to become the 51st state in the U.S.

Citing a “vibrational mismatch with Sacramento,” the mountain’s representatives—comprised of local mystics, off-grid influencers, and an allegedly telepathic Lemurian council—claim the region is better off governing itself.

“Mount Shasta operates on a higher frequency,” said interim governor and part-time Reiki master Skylar Moonbeam. “We deserve self-governance, tax-free sage bundles, and a state holiday for full moons.”

The proposed state, tentatively called Shastafornia, will have its own constitution, which includes rights to free-range spiritual expression, mandatory sunrise meditation, and a ban on negative vibes. Plans are already underway to mint a state coin shaped like a quartz crystal.

Reactions have been mixed. One local hiker was overheard saying, “Honestly, this tracks.”

The federal government has yet to respond, though rumors suggest the Pentagon is reviewing Mount Shasta’s UFO activity logs before taking action.