Famed Robber D.B. Cooper Found Alive and Well in Northern California Nursing Home

*Happy April Fool’s Day! This article is part of the Active NorCal April Fool’s Day Extravaganza. Don’t @ us.

The man imagined to be a cross between Indiana Jones, James Bond and Superman has been located in an assisted-living facility in Corning, California.

In 1971, the dashing robber hijacked a Boeing 727 airplane going from Portland to Seattle. In Seattle he demanded and received $200,000 in cash while they refueled the plane and passengers were allowed to leave. That evening the plane with a skeleton crew then headed south and east at Cooper’s direction. Somewhere over Oregon or Northern California Cooper parachuted into the darkness, and was never seen or heard from again… until now.

“Yeah,” said the elderly man (known to his friends as Herbert Schwartz), “I’m really D. B. Cooper.”

“The chicks,” he winked, “really dig it.”